aridhills:

okbutwhyamisotired:

showerthoughtsofficial:

when there’s an earthquake coffins become maracas.

?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

No???????

yeehawlw:

stimmyabby:

ask your doctor what the fuck

retiredtothesaltonsea:

mitski miyawaki invented justice

miamaroo:

Going into therapy like

kramergate:

i’ve started using the word “sexy” a lot more just because it’s like… an inflammatory word… describing something weird as “hot” is like ok gross whatever but “sexy” just makes people go crazy like either they agree wholeheartedy or they want you dead

ageostrophic:

me: *venting about my job*

someone: why don’t you just quit then

me: 

funereal-disease:

this is a strong contender for the funniest fucking thing I’ve ever seen

anais-nyx:

virgoboy:

i am so sick of us politics no offence but i hope your country collapses before 2020 begins because i can’t stand to hear about it anymore

christmasbarakat:

my dad is a cop and i just called him and he was like “hey i have a 17 year old boy in the back of my cop car right now that i’m running him to the station” and i asked if he was cute and my dad said “Hey, my daughter wants to know if you’re cute” and the guy said “i want to say yes, sir” and my dad started laughing so hard